ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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