Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
wow bdsm is so cute
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