just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize