its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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