She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
