The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
