I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
