Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
