I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
