just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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