i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
