Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
