pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize
