Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
wow bdsm is so cute
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
