why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Randomize
