life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
