I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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