You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Randomize