whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
