My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
