I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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