I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
