did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I love having hate sex.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
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