god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize