So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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