It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
last night I used snow as a chaser
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