wat bout pragnant strippers??
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Randomize
