She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
There was a lot of him and a little penis
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Randomize
