Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
