Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
