found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I am midnight drunk by noon
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
