me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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