There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize