tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
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even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Of course I have a pirate flag
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize