i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
