How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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