dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
