it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
