did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize