I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
