well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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