my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Randomize