My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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