Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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