And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
