Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
