i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
