My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Duck Duck Cougar?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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