don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
