her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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