Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
