One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Bang-toberfest begins!!
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
